Erk. Yesterday was a painful day. Now I know how it feels like when you have a body temperature of 39 degrees Celsius. Not for the weak, I tell ya. Ooof. And for some reason, my dad has a fever too. I still think it was because of the burgers he bought a few days ago. Not that I don't want to eat Ramly burgers again (Best Burgers in the World) but maybe he should watch where he buys them, because hey, roadside stalls aren't exactly goldne examples of hygeine you know. Anyway, I feel tons better now, temperature dropping to 37.5. Glad that's over. Voice is still hoarse though. Mom allowed me not to fast today. I don't mind, I have no appetite anyway. Man, this fever really did a number on my head, it feels like I went a round with Mike Tyson on steroids. Last night, I thought my mom was Santa Claus. It was that bad.
Fever can give you strange dreams at night.
I'm a regular follower of award shows, I get all giggly when one comes around. Oscar for example, I wanted Return of the King to win. Boy, did it ever! And now, up comes the Asian Television Awards, saluting the best in Asian Television. I noticed one thing in the history of the ATA. In the Acting categories, to my knowledge, and memory, no Malay has ever been nominated. I'm not surprised of course, since in Drama, they tend to over-act or under-perform while in Comedy, most are just lame. Which is why I'm rubbing my eyes to see Aaron Aziz nominated for Best Drama Actor for his role in Heartlanders and Suhaimi Yusof nominated for Best Comedy Actor for his role in Living With Lydia. Aaron, I confess, deserves the nom. Not sure if he deserves to win. He'll be up against the usual Thai soap actors the ATA likes to favor. Still, he should be proud, being the only Singaporean drama actor nominated. Drama is Singapore telly's weak point (Masters of the Seas, Paradise) Suhaimi though. I never really liked him. Living With Lydia depended too much on slapstick and Suhaimi was one of the biggest offenders. And the fact that Lydia herself wasn't nominated shows that the judges consider Suhaimi the best performer in the show. What?!?! Regardless, he must have shown that extra something to be nominated and for that, I commend him. Better him than Gurmit Singh AGAIN! Here's the link.
Blogs are really catching on, aren't they? There even was programme dedicated to it the other day. Searching around, I found a site that featured the best Singapore Blogs of last year. Winner? You all may have heard of her. Xiaxue. Not sure whether I like it. I mean, look at all that PINK!!! But she does blog in her own unique and funny way. Being quite the looker (and I bet she's proud of being quite the looker) helps. Hmmm, you know, my blog already has a catchy name. I wonder if I submit it for award consideration......eh, maybe 2005.
Wendy, if you're reading this, which is beyond doubtful but if you are, know that I have become one of the gazillion people that have become inspired by you. And Jamie Yeo is sexy. Yes, maybe a little on the skinny side, but still sexy enough for my uncontrollable hormones.
Long post isn't it? Guess what they say is true: "Good writers must suffer like mad. The best die before they form a sentence." OK, I made that up.
It is awkward isn't it, eating baked potatoes in daytime during the fasting month? They're delicious, too bad I still feel like puking.
19 days until Valve and Vivdendi Universal Games unleash the heavenly gaming goodness that is Half-Life 2......
Thursday, October 28, 2004
Wednesday, October 27, 2004
HA-CHOO!
It's not fair. The holidays I've waited so long for comes around and I get sick. A fever, a bad cough, the sniffles. This is really not my year, is it?
Tuesday, October 26, 2004
Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas
Look at that. I was so caught up in Half-Life 2 fever that I nearly forgot another game that I want to play is released today.
Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas
Since I don't have a PS2, I can't play it now. I can't play it anyway since the censors surely banned this in our fair country. (Gambling, gangs, prostitution, bad for nation building, you know) so when the PC version comes out next year, I'm going to either have to find a pirate CD shop or download it from the net. It'll take awhile, but from the looks of things, I'd say it will be worth it.
Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas
Since I don't have a PS2, I can't play it now. I can't play it anyway since the censors surely banned this in our fair country. (Gambling, gangs, prostitution, bad for nation building, you know) so when the PC version comes out next year, I'm going to either have to find a pirate CD shop or download it from the net. It'll take awhile, but from the looks of things, I'd say it will be worth it.
Monday, October 25, 2004
Go Gunners.....
So, Arsenal finally lost. To Man U too. Eh, we have to lose some day. But to Man U? Well, let's just consider this a wake-up call, shall we? After all, Arsenal did went one season where they lost only once before. But see, this is a measure of how I don't really care too much about soccer anymore. My most favourite team goes down, and I'm only indifferent to it. But I still will celebrate like it's 2099 once Man U goes bankrupt. Sooner or later, my friends. Sooner or later.....
Sunday, October 24, 2004
Three...
They say good things come in threes. Here's a good example: Last Wednesday, three good things happened.
1) First, as I already mentioned, HALF-LIFE 2 IS OUT NOVEMBER 16TH! That's 2 days after Hari Raya. So it will be a very good week then.
2) My exams finished! Thus endeth the worst semester in any school that I have ever endured.
3) New Proton Wira my dad bought. Best damn car I've ever been in! Enough space for my big legs, comfy seats, and a CD player. Sound doesn't have that 'OOMPH' factor, but you can't have everything.
And now, I'm alone, typing this as my family goes to JB. I'd follow them, but I already did yesterday, and I am too bushed to follow them shopping again. Not like they would buy anything I want. And no, a new shirt and pair of shoes is something I need. There's a difference between want and need.
There, better stop here. Have to save the world (again) in Tom Clancy's Splinter Cell. (Highly Recommended.)
23 days to Half-Life 2...
1) First, as I already mentioned, HALF-LIFE 2 IS OUT NOVEMBER 16TH! That's 2 days after Hari Raya. So it will be a very good week then.
2) My exams finished! Thus endeth the worst semester in any school that I have ever endured.
3) New Proton Wira my dad bought. Best damn car I've ever been in! Enough space for my big legs, comfy seats, and a CD player. Sound doesn't have that 'OOMPH' factor, but you can't have everything.
And now, I'm alone, typing this as my family goes to JB. I'd follow them, but I already did yesterday, and I am too bushed to follow them shopping again. Not like they would buy anything I want. And no, a new shirt and pair of shoes is something I need. There's a difference between want and need.
There, better stop here. Have to save the world (again) in Tom Clancy's Splinter Cell. (Highly Recommended.)
23 days to Half-Life 2...
Tuesday, October 19, 2004
GOLD!!!
HALF-LIFE 2 IS GOLD!!!!!!!!!
November 16th 2004 - The Countdown Begins!
VIVENDI UNIVERSAL GAMES ANNOUNCES PLANS TO LAUNCH THE MOST ANTICIPATED PC ACTION GAME OF 2004
Half-Life® 2 to Ship to Retail Outlets Globally This Holiday Season
LOS ANGELES (October 18, 2004) – Vivendi Universal Games (VU Games) today announced that Half-Life® ,2, the sequel to one of the most critically acclaimed PC titles in gaming history, will ship to retail outlets around the world in November. The Company confirmed that Half-Life 2, developed by Valve Software, has gone gold with a planned retail street date of November 16, 2004. The countdown to the highly anticipated retail street date has begun around the world, as VU Games completes plans to ship localized versions of Half-Life 2 simultaneously in English, French, Spanish, Italian, German, Traditional and Simplified Chinese, Korean, Thai and Japanese.
"Half-Life 2 has surpassed our expectations in every sense – its high-quality graphics, ground-breaking physics and immersive first-person shooter gameplay set a new standard for PC action games," said Bruce Hack, CEO of VU Games. "Half-Life 2 will go down as one of the best-selling PC titles, and we are thrilled to deliver this ground-breaking title to the worldwide gaming community this fall."
Hailed as "...the best game ever made" by PC Gamer, Half-Life 2 earned a top-rated review score of 98, the highest score bestowed by the magazine in more than six years. The game has received numerous accolades for its technical excellence, captivating story and addictive game play, including more than 10 awards and nominations at the 2004 Electronic Entertainment Expo. In addition to being named "Best PC Game" by 1up.com (Ziff Davis) and Gamespy.com, the title also received a "Technological Excellence on PC" award from IGN.com. CNNMoney.com stated that "Half-Life 2 will redefine what gamers expect from their games visually – and the gameplay is a lot of fun as well."
The global anticipation for Half-Life 2 has reached unprecedented heights, as consumers around the world mark their calendars to buy the game at retail on November 16th. The Half-Life 2 product will include Counter-Strike: Source. VU Games will also release a Half Life 2 Collector’s Edition that will include Half-Life 2 in DVD-ROM format, Counter-Strike: Source, Half-Life: Source, a free limited edition t-shirt, and a Half-Life 2 Prima strategy guide book.
The original Half-Life game was launched in 1998 under VU Games’ Sierra Entertainment publishing label. It earned more than 50 game-of-the-year awards and has been heralded as one of the best PC first-person shooter games of all-time.
About Half-Life® and Half-Life® 2
In 1998, Half-Life revolutionized the game industry with its combination of pounding action and continuous, immersive storytelling. Valve’s debut title was named "Best PC Game Ever" by PC Gamer and launched a franchise with more than eight million retails units sold worldwide. In 2004, Half-Life 2 will take the suspense, challenge and visceral charge of the original to new heights of realism and responsiveness. Half-Life 2 opens the door to a world where the player’s presence affects everything around him, from the physical environments to the behaviors – even the emotions – of both friends and enemies. The player again picks up the crowbar of research scientist, Gordon Freeman, who finds himself on an alien-infested Earth being picked to the bone, its resources depleted and its population dwindling. Freeman is thrust into the unenviable role of rescuing the world from the wrong he unleashed back at Black Mesa. And a lot of people – people he cares about – are counting on him. The intense, real-time gameplay of Half-Life 2 is made possible only by Source, Valve’s new proprietary engine technology. Source provides major enhancements in the advanced facial animation system, physics, graphics and AI. Half-Life 2 will be available for the PC.
About Vivendi Universal Games
Headquartered in Los Angeles, VU Games is a leading global developer, publisher and distributor of multi-platform interactive entertainment. Its development studios and publishing labels include Blizzard Entertainment, Sierra Entertainment, Fox Interactive and Massive Entertainment. VU Games’ library of over 700 titles features multi-million unit selling properties such as Warcraft®, StarCraft®, Diablo® and World of Warcraft® from Blizzard Entertainment®; Crash Bandicoot®, Spyro The Dragon™, Empire Earth®, Leisure Suit Larry™, Tribes® and Ground Control®.
November 16th 2004 - The Countdown Begins!
VIVENDI UNIVERSAL GAMES ANNOUNCES PLANS TO LAUNCH THE MOST ANTICIPATED PC ACTION GAME OF 2004
Half-Life® 2 to Ship to Retail Outlets Globally This Holiday Season
LOS ANGELES (October 18, 2004) – Vivendi Universal Games (VU Games) today announced that Half-Life® ,2, the sequel to one of the most critically acclaimed PC titles in gaming history, will ship to retail outlets around the world in November. The Company confirmed that Half-Life 2, developed by Valve Software, has gone gold with a planned retail street date of November 16, 2004. The countdown to the highly anticipated retail street date has begun around the world, as VU Games completes plans to ship localized versions of Half-Life 2 simultaneously in English, French, Spanish, Italian, German, Traditional and Simplified Chinese, Korean, Thai and Japanese.
"Half-Life 2 has surpassed our expectations in every sense – its high-quality graphics, ground-breaking physics and immersive first-person shooter gameplay set a new standard for PC action games," said Bruce Hack, CEO of VU Games. "Half-Life 2 will go down as one of the best-selling PC titles, and we are thrilled to deliver this ground-breaking title to the worldwide gaming community this fall."
Hailed as "...the best game ever made" by PC Gamer, Half-Life 2 earned a top-rated review score of 98, the highest score bestowed by the magazine in more than six years. The game has received numerous accolades for its technical excellence, captivating story and addictive game play, including more than 10 awards and nominations at the 2004 Electronic Entertainment Expo. In addition to being named "Best PC Game" by 1up.com (Ziff Davis) and Gamespy.com, the title also received a "Technological Excellence on PC" award from IGN.com. CNNMoney.com stated that "Half-Life 2 will redefine what gamers expect from their games visually – and the gameplay is a lot of fun as well."
The global anticipation for Half-Life 2 has reached unprecedented heights, as consumers around the world mark their calendars to buy the game at retail on November 16th. The Half-Life 2 product will include Counter-Strike: Source. VU Games will also release a Half Life 2 Collector’s Edition that will include Half-Life 2 in DVD-ROM format, Counter-Strike: Source, Half-Life: Source, a free limited edition t-shirt, and a Half-Life 2 Prima strategy guide book.
The original Half-Life game was launched in 1998 under VU Games’ Sierra Entertainment publishing label. It earned more than 50 game-of-the-year awards and has been heralded as one of the best PC first-person shooter games of all-time.
About Half-Life® and Half-Life® 2
In 1998, Half-Life revolutionized the game industry with its combination of pounding action and continuous, immersive storytelling. Valve’s debut title was named "Best PC Game Ever" by PC Gamer and launched a franchise with more than eight million retails units sold worldwide. In 2004, Half-Life 2 will take the suspense, challenge and visceral charge of the original to new heights of realism and responsiveness. Half-Life 2 opens the door to a world where the player’s presence affects everything around him, from the physical environments to the behaviors – even the emotions – of both friends and enemies. The player again picks up the crowbar of research scientist, Gordon Freeman, who finds himself on an alien-infested Earth being picked to the bone, its resources depleted and its population dwindling. Freeman is thrust into the unenviable role of rescuing the world from the wrong he unleashed back at Black Mesa. And a lot of people – people he cares about – are counting on him. The intense, real-time gameplay of Half-Life 2 is made possible only by Source, Valve’s new proprietary engine technology. Source provides major enhancements in the advanced facial animation system, physics, graphics and AI. Half-Life 2 will be available for the PC.
About Vivendi Universal Games
Headquartered in Los Angeles, VU Games is a leading global developer, publisher and distributor of multi-platform interactive entertainment. Its development studios and publishing labels include Blizzard Entertainment, Sierra Entertainment, Fox Interactive and Massive Entertainment. VU Games’ library of over 700 titles features multi-million unit selling properties such as Warcraft®, StarCraft®, Diablo® and World of Warcraft® from Blizzard Entertainment®; Crash Bandicoot®, Spyro The Dragon™, Empire Earth®, Leisure Suit Larry™, Tribes® and Ground Control®.
Sunday, October 17, 2004
Rest in Peace...
How many of you have watched Superman: The Movie? Ah, one of my favourite movies of all time, that was. It saddened me when Marlon Brando, who played Superman's dad in that movie, died. And now Superman himself has died. Christopher Reeves is simply the best Superman ever. He truly made me believe a man can fly. This world is a poorer place without him.
Superman's Song - Crash Test Dummies
Tarzan wasn't a ladies' man
He'd just come along and scoop 'em up under his arm
Like that, quick as a cat in the jungle
But Clark Kent, now there was a real gent
He would not be caught sittin' around in no
Junglescape, dumb as an ape doing nothing
[CHORUS]
Superman never made any money
For saving the world from Solomon Grundy
And sometimes I despair the world will never see
Another man like him
Hey Bob, Supe had a straight job
Even though he could have smashed through any bank
In the United States, he had the strength, but he would now
Folks said his family were all dead
Their planet crumbled but Superman, he forced himself
To carry on, forget Krypton, and keep going
Tarzan was king of the jungle and Lord over all the apes
But he could hardly string together four words: "I Tarzan, You Jane."
Sometimes when Supe was stopping crimes
I'll bet that he was tempted to just quit and turn his back
On man, join Tarzan in the forest
But he stayed in the city, and kept on changing clothes
In dirty old phonebooths till his work was through
And nothing to do but go on home
Superman's Song - Crash Test Dummies
Tarzan wasn't a ladies' man
He'd just come along and scoop 'em up under his arm
Like that, quick as a cat in the jungle
But Clark Kent, now there was a real gent
He would not be caught sittin' around in no
Junglescape, dumb as an ape doing nothing
[CHORUS]
Superman never made any money
For saving the world from Solomon Grundy
And sometimes I despair the world will never see
Another man like him
Hey Bob, Supe had a straight job
Even though he could have smashed through any bank
In the United States, he had the strength, but he would now
Folks said his family were all dead
Their planet crumbled but Superman, he forced himself
To carry on, forget Krypton, and keep going
Tarzan was king of the jungle and Lord over all the apes
But he could hardly string together four words: "I Tarzan, You Jane."
Sometimes when Supe was stopping crimes
I'll bet that he was tempted to just quit and turn his back
On man, join Tarzan in the forest
But he stayed in the city, and kept on changing clothes
In dirty old phonebooths till his work was through
And nothing to do but go on home
Thursday, October 14, 2004
Oooh Yeah!
'Viruses can ruin your computer. Spyware can ruin your life'
^One of the best slogans ever. Here's a link to Adwarereport.com
That website reports all the news in the war against the #1 scourge of the internet, Spyware. Yup, pushing viruses to #2. A virus can wreck your computer. No biggie, it can be fixed. But spyware, well, here's an example. An important project, you've finished it, now you have to present it. The presentation goes smoothly. Suddenly, one of the hidden spyware programs decides to do its work and show a pop-up ad to HornyXXX.com (just an example, doesn't exist, I hope). Pictures and all. Very embarrasing, no? That website also lists a Top 10 list of Best Anti-Spyware Program. Try one of 'em. It will change your life.
^One of the best slogans ever. Here's a link to Adwarereport.com
That website reports all the news in the war against the #1 scourge of the internet, Spyware. Yup, pushing viruses to #2. A virus can wreck your computer. No biggie, it can be fixed. But spyware, well, here's an example. An important project, you've finished it, now you have to present it. The presentation goes smoothly. Suddenly, one of the hidden spyware programs decides to do its work and show a pop-up ad to HornyXXX.com (just an example, doesn't exist, I hope). Pictures and all. Very embarrasing, no? That website also lists a Top 10 list of Best Anti-Spyware Program. Try one of 'em. It will change your life.
Thursday, October 07, 2004
Adui...
Apparently there's this anti-malay Friendster account. I didn't see it because I can't. The link I got leads to an Invalid User ID page. Good thing that of course. Wish I could've seen it before it got shut down though. I'd like to have written the most cuss-filled testimonial ever made in that account. Now my only record from that account is from Shanaz's blog. Funny, weren't the Malays the first to settle here in this island LONG before Raffles came by? I won't bother cussing about it here, since many people have done it already. But I'd just like to comment about this sentence: "however those f@#$%n huan nas do not noe tat their sense of fashion is reali bad. likes to wear those really cheap t-shirts tat we chinese dun even dare to wear and those fuckin ugly tapered pants." Are you freakin' kidding me? I have a bad fashion sense of course, but I am the only Malay I personally know to have a bad fashion sense. And what does "huan na" mean anyway? I'd just like to pray to God to pity this poor soul.
So some people are signing a petition to bring Jassea (wrong spelling but I don't care). Guys, here's an advice: Don't sign it. I don't care whether she deserves to leave or not. The bottom line is, she got the least votes next to Beverly, so she's outta there. Now these petitionists (sic) are trying to make up for their mistake of not rallying to vote for her last week. Now she's paid for it, so too bad, people. You'll just have to vote for somebody else. I suggest Olinda.
So some people are signing a petition to bring Jassea (wrong spelling but I don't care). Guys, here's an advice: Don't sign it. I don't care whether she deserves to leave or not. The bottom line is, she got the least votes next to Beverly, so she's outta there. Now these petitionists (sic) are trying to make up for their mistake of not rallying to vote for her last week. Now she's paid for it, so too bad, people. You'll just have to vote for somebody else. I suggest Olinda.
Tuesday, October 05, 2004
Heaven is a horsefly
I saw this cartoon is The Sunday New Paper. It had a point. Matrix Reloaded. R (no one above 18 can watch) in America, PG (everybody can watch) here? Strange. And they say we're censoring too much.
Dammit! Undertaker didn't win on Sunday. Where is the justice? Dead, like him I guess.
Right, don't take my word for it, since I'm hoooked to the internet, but this is my last post for awhile. I need to focus on the exams, dammit! I need to pass everything. I need them so my mom can buy the TV she's been promising me. So, bye bye for now. And don't forget to write.
Dammit! Undertaker didn't win on Sunday. Where is the justice? Dead, like him I guess.
Right, don't take my word for it, since I'm hoooked to the internet, but this is my last post for awhile. I need to focus on the exams, dammit! I need to pass everything. I need them so my mom can buy the TV she's been promising me. So, bye bye for now. And don't forget to write.
Friday, October 01, 2004
Go Kerry! Go Kerry!
Right now, I'm listening to the US presidential debate as I type this. Now I'm no expert when it comes to debates, but I think this is a very close one. Bush has been attacking Kerry every chance he's got. And he's got a point, Kerry has been 'flip-flopping' a bit. For or against the war? Anyway, I still think Bush has been an awful president. Going to war even with all the other choice. Going to war against a country that had nothing to do with 9/11. He didn't do it as a last resort as he promised. Actually, I realize that I want Bush to lose not because of Bush himself, but because of his VP, Dick Cheney. I keep getting the feeling that he's the true power in the White House. But what do I know? I'm not American. But I am of voting age there, so I think it's vitally important for me to understand this. And hope the US people make the right choice. Anyway, debates. Bush is his usual simple, easy, country boy style. That coulc endear him to the young people, currently his biggest supporters. Kerry is your usual serious debator. More befitting of a President. Hmmm...
In a somewhat related story, I'm watching the debates from the internet. I'm kinda surprised. My internet streaming video has never been this smooth before. And this is live. I can even see non-stop pictures, where before I only see 5 seconds pictures, 10 seconds pause, while the sound kept playing. Very good news.
In a somewhat related story, I'm watching the debates from the internet. I'm kinda surprised. My internet streaming video has never been this smooth before. And this is live. I can even see non-stop pictures, where before I only see 5 seconds pictures, 10 seconds pause, while the sound kept playing. Very good news.
Thursday, September 30, 2004
Alahai...
Alahai...what's up with everyone? I know exams are approaching faster than an express train, but is that why you guys have to look so moody? OK, fine, I guess I'm kinda moody myself. Because of "something" I did, I am now forced to wake up at 5:50am instead of the usual 6:30am. That's a big difference. I am not a morning person. Thank God this semester will end soon. That's one of the plus points of my 'heck care' attitude. I 'heck care' my current problems and try to enjoy myself whenever I can. When I have to study, I study, but otherwise I just, what's the term, slack. It's not popular with my parents, but it keeps me sane.
Here's wishing the Undertaker good luck in winning the WWE Championship Belt this Sunday at No Mercy.
Here's wishing the Undertaker good luck in winning the WWE Championship Belt this Sunday at No Mercy.
Friday, September 24, 2004
Who cares about a freaking title?
Sasha says in her blog that people who wear red are confident people. I wear red a lot of times. I have more red shirts than any other shirts. Even got red shoes. So does that make me confident? Who knows, but I do feel it, the confidence flowing through me. Knowing my life, it will go away just as the exam comes steaming towards me, around the same time as Ramadan pulak tu. So better make the most of this.
I just had another dream. I was a Singapore Idol contestant and by golly, I was the most popular. And I acted like I've never acted before. Ah well, assuming there's another season coming, I've got until the next auditions to change my whole self. The way I dress, more importantly the way I present myself, most importantly the way my singing voice sounds. I just realized my normal speech stuttering problems go away when I sing. Now all I have to do is make sure I don't make a big fool of myself. And not sing a Backstreet Boys song. What the hell was I thinking?
Wherefore art thou, Half-Life 2?
I just had another dream. I was a Singapore Idol contestant and by golly, I was the most popular. And I acted like I've never acted before. Ah well, assuming there's another season coming, I've got until the next auditions to change my whole self. The way I dress, more importantly the way I present myself, most importantly the way my singing voice sounds. I just realized my normal speech stuttering problems go away when I sing. Now all I have to do is make sure I don't make a big fool of myself. And not sing a Backstreet Boys song. What the hell was I thinking?
Wherefore art thou, Half-Life 2?
Monday, September 20, 2004
Change is in the air
How many times in my life have I swore that I would change myself? Hmmm, twice the number of Elizabeth Taylor's ex-husbands I think.
I had a talk with good ole Dad. I can say what I want about him, but I can't deny he's always there for me when I need him, whether I realize it or not. Among other things, he told me something I've known for a long time: Change Thyself. I can't remain the shy, weird, irritable guy I am. I know I'm good with people, I just need to learn how to break the ice myself. I have to be as outgoing as my dad. Without being him. Which is impossible, but I'm gonna try anyway.
This post will close with the lyrics of what I think is the greatest dance song ever: Paul Van Dyk's Time Of Our Lives. I can imagine this song being played at my graduation ceremony.
There's a time for us to let go
There's a time for holding on
A time to speak, a time to listen
There's a time for us to go
There's a time for living low down
There's a time for getting high
A time for peace, a time for fire
A time to live, a time to die
A time to scream, a time for silence
A time to scream, a time for silence
A time for truth against the lies
A time for fate, a time for science
There's a time for us to shine
There is a time for mis-believing
There's a time to understand
A time for hurt, a time for healing
A time you run, to make a stand
Oh, this is the time of our lives (x 4)
Hold on
I had a talk with good ole Dad. I can say what I want about him, but I can't deny he's always there for me when I need him, whether I realize it or not. Among other things, he told me something I've known for a long time: Change Thyself. I can't remain the shy, weird, irritable guy I am. I know I'm good with people, I just need to learn how to break the ice myself. I have to be as outgoing as my dad. Without being him. Which is impossible, but I'm gonna try anyway.
This post will close with the lyrics of what I think is the greatest dance song ever: Paul Van Dyk's Time Of Our Lives. I can imagine this song being played at my graduation ceremony.
There's a time for us to let go
There's a time for holding on
A time to speak, a time to listen
There's a time for us to go
There's a time for living low down
There's a time for getting high
A time for peace, a time for fire
A time to live, a time to die
A time to scream, a time for silence
A time to scream, a time for silence
A time for truth against the lies
A time for fate, a time for science
There's a time for us to shine
There is a time for mis-believing
There's a time to understand
A time for hurt, a time for healing
A time you run, to make a stand
Oh, this is the time of our lives (x 4)
Hold on
Thursday, September 16, 2004
You know, I once considered jumping on the MRT tracks.
Personal history time: June Holidays 2002. BBQ with students from YISS 4E3 & 4E5. Germany Vs Saudi Arabia was playing on TV. I was sitting on one spot eating my plate of rice. Faryn sat next to me. At this time, she was just someone I saw at school occasionally. She was crying. I asked her why. She said, "I don't know, I just feel like crying."
That's how I feel now. I'm crying and I'm not sure why. Of course, everything has a reason, and I guess my reason is that I'm being bogged down by all my problems and I'm carrying it all alone. It's at that point when I just don't care about anything anymore.
Problems:
Poly Life - It's tough, tougher than I imagined. Work here, projects there, chaos everywhere. But I get by fine.
Family Life - I am honest-to-god trying to be nicer to my sister. But we are two completely different people and it's hard. But I suppose I should be thankful that there is someone in my house I could talk to for help, even if I don't ask for help that often. There is my father, and I suppose I could talk to him, but frankly, he's still a little timidating. And Mom, she's a nice lady, but I just don't like having a personal talk with her.
Social Life - And here we have my #1 problem. My dad is right, I live too much in my own world. While I go and make myself happy, I ignored all those good kind people who wanted, who actually wanted to make friends with me. And in my own naive way, I pushed them away. By God, a Sec 4 girl once approached me and offered to be my friend because she felt sorry for me always eating my Mee Soto alone. This was in Sec 2. Now, for some reason, I just can't click with my classmates. Sometimes I just feel like they're ignoring me. That's my fault too, I should have gone out of my way to interact with them instead of sitting by myself. And for some godforsaken reason, I find myself wanting to have more female friends than male friends. Not because I want to have a steady girlfriend, but because...you know what, I don't know, I just don't know. I know I have a core group of friends. The friends I made in Sporst Camp. The Floorball team. Faryn, Ernie, Millie, Monica among others. But all of them have other groups of friends. In the end, I'm left alone, eating my Mee Soto.
Man, do I sound whiny or what? Anyway, my little rant has done its job. I feel a little better now. And a little hollow. And a little lonely. There's this wrestler. His gimmick is that of a person who doesn't care about anything at all, even himself. All his previous problems have left a cold soulless man who feels useless. What use does he have in this world? Go out to the ring, hurt someone, leave and continues living an empty life, alone. I do not want that life.
And please, guys, if you want to lecture me, like say "Do something, go out there and make friends", don't. I didn't write this to get lectures. I did it to lighten my heavy emotional load.
I'm happy about one thing though: My sister just asked me what's wrong. She did it like in typical Ili style, meaning she did it half-sarcastically, but she did it. She rarely does that. And one more thing: Sometimes I do wish I'm not her brother. Not because I hate her, but because I keep thinking I've failed in my duties as her big brother, and she deserves someone better.
Personal history time: June Holidays 2002. BBQ with students from YISS 4E3 & 4E5. Germany Vs Saudi Arabia was playing on TV. I was sitting on one spot eating my plate of rice. Faryn sat next to me. At this time, she was just someone I saw at school occasionally. She was crying. I asked her why. She said, "I don't know, I just feel like crying."
That's how I feel now. I'm crying and I'm not sure why. Of course, everything has a reason, and I guess my reason is that I'm being bogged down by all my problems and I'm carrying it all alone. It's at that point when I just don't care about anything anymore.
Problems:
Poly Life - It's tough, tougher than I imagined. Work here, projects there, chaos everywhere. But I get by fine.
Family Life - I am honest-to-god trying to be nicer to my sister. But we are two completely different people and it's hard. But I suppose I should be thankful that there is someone in my house I could talk to for help, even if I don't ask for help that often. There is my father, and I suppose I could talk to him, but frankly, he's still a little timidating. And Mom, she's a nice lady, but I just don't like having a personal talk with her.
Social Life - And here we have my #1 problem. My dad is right, I live too much in my own world. While I go and make myself happy, I ignored all those good kind people who wanted, who actually wanted to make friends with me. And in my own naive way, I pushed them away. By God, a Sec 4 girl once approached me and offered to be my friend because she felt sorry for me always eating my Mee Soto alone. This was in Sec 2. Now, for some reason, I just can't click with my classmates. Sometimes I just feel like they're ignoring me. That's my fault too, I should have gone out of my way to interact with them instead of sitting by myself. And for some godforsaken reason, I find myself wanting to have more female friends than male friends. Not because I want to have a steady girlfriend, but because...you know what, I don't know, I just don't know. I know I have a core group of friends. The friends I made in Sporst Camp. The Floorball team. Faryn, Ernie, Millie, Monica among others. But all of them have other groups of friends. In the end, I'm left alone, eating my Mee Soto.
Man, do I sound whiny or what? Anyway, my little rant has done its job. I feel a little better now. And a little hollow. And a little lonely. There's this wrestler. His gimmick is that of a person who doesn't care about anything at all, even himself. All his previous problems have left a cold soulless man who feels useless. What use does he have in this world? Go out to the ring, hurt someone, leave and continues living an empty life, alone. I do not want that life.
And please, guys, if you want to lecture me, like say "Do something, go out there and make friends", don't. I didn't write this to get lectures. I did it to lighten my heavy emotional load.
I'm happy about one thing though: My sister just asked me what's wrong. She did it like in typical Ili style, meaning she did it half-sarcastically, but she did it. She rarely does that. And one more thing: Sometimes I do wish I'm not her brother. Not because I hate her, but because I keep thinking I've failed in my duties as her big brother, and she deserves someone better.
Wednesday, September 15, 2004
A truly historic post...
Yes, my friends, this truly is a historic post. This is the first time I'm posting a post...from a class, something I've never done before.
What? You don't think this is historic? Eh, up to you.
See, when I first started this blog, not only is it because I wanted to hop in the Blogger Bandwagon, but because I wanted to comment on all that is current in our world. Then I realized all that is current in our world is currently BORING. Suicide bombing here, reality show there. Same old, same old. Yawn. Besides, Shanaz does that job brilliantly enough. (BTW, no, I am not in favour of women in NS, not because they can't handle it. Au Contraire, it's because they CAN handle it, and handle it so well they will kick the men's butts from Pulau Tekong to Pulau Ubin. And if there's one thing some men can't handle, it's being beat by a girl.) When it comes to writing non-fiction stuff, I can't compete with her. Fiction, however...but I digress. Now I use this blog (which I have dubbed Sm4113r's Domain after my Matrix Forum ID) to post, to paraphrase a blurb from Bridget Jones' Diary, the "Random Ramblings of a Pissed 18-year-old". Which leads me to today's Random Ramble.
I WANT MY EGGS!!! I NEED MY EGGS!!! I CAN BARELY TAKE IT WITHOUT MY EGG & MAYONNAISE SANDWICH FOR BREAKFAST!!! DAMN THOSE FOOLS AT THE AVA!!! DAMN THEM ALL!!!
Thus concludes today's post. Thank you for bothering to read it from top to bottom.
What? You don't think this is historic? Eh, up to you.
See, when I first started this blog, not only is it because I wanted to hop in the Blogger Bandwagon, but because I wanted to comment on all that is current in our world. Then I realized all that is current in our world is currently BORING. Suicide bombing here, reality show there. Same old, same old. Yawn. Besides, Shanaz does that job brilliantly enough. (BTW, no, I am not in favour of women in NS, not because they can't handle it. Au Contraire, it's because they CAN handle it, and handle it so well they will kick the men's butts from Pulau Tekong to Pulau Ubin. And if there's one thing some men can't handle, it's being beat by a girl.) When it comes to writing non-fiction stuff, I can't compete with her. Fiction, however...but I digress. Now I use this blog (which I have dubbed Sm4113r's Domain after my Matrix Forum ID) to post, to paraphrase a blurb from Bridget Jones' Diary, the "Random Ramblings of a Pissed 18-year-old". Which leads me to today's Random Ramble.
I WANT MY EGGS!!! I NEED MY EGGS!!! I CAN BARELY TAKE IT WITHOUT MY EGG & MAYONNAISE SANDWICH FOR BREAKFAST!!! DAMN THOSE FOOLS AT THE AVA!!! DAMN THEM ALL!!!
Thus concludes today's post. Thank you for bothering to read it from top to bottom.
Saturday, September 11, 2004
In memoriam
http://home.mchsi.com/~gcfl/attack.swf
This Flash was made by a New Yorker to remember the terrorist attacks exactly 3 years to this day.
I remember that day. My mom had asked me to turn off my radio to study. This was around 8:40pm, 8:40am New York time. If I had left it on for just 10 more minutes, I would have heard Jamie Yeo break the news that a plane had hit one of the World Trade Center towers in New York. While the 4 planes that were hijacked crashed along with a few hundred innocent lives and the terrorists that held them hostage, I just sat there studying, blissfully unaware. Around 10, I stooped because I wanted to watch WWF SummerSlam. My sister came in my room, with a weird look on her face. I didn't ask why, I was so focused on waiting for SummerSlam to start. I turned on my radio for awhile. The music was sombre, Jamie was speaking in a mournful tone. Then I realized something was wrong. But then SummerSlam started and I turned off the radio before I learned why.
The theme song to SummerSlam was playing. I remembered thinking, "Hey! Catchy!" And then finally, tracking at the bottom of my screen, I finally realised why my sister looked weird, why Jamie sounded so sad. "The second tower of the World Trade Center has collapsed." That's what it said. I immediately switched to Channel NewsAsia. I think you can guess what I saw. And keep in mind that the TV I was watching was in black & white, so that made everything darker, more vivid. In the end, I forgot about WWF, that seemed inconsequential compared to this. An attack on humanity.
I don't care about what happened after. The distrust of some people against Islam, the wars, the economy. All I cared about was the people that died. The brave people that dared to stand up to the terrorists in one of the planes and thereby saving possibly the White House itself, at the expense of their lives. The people who jumped out of the towers to end it all, why delay the inevitable? I admit, all this made me look at my faith more carefully. But after all this, I was shocked, I was afraid, I was angry, but I was NOT surprised. With so many people hating America so much, something like this had to happen eventually. All the more unfortunate that it did happen.
To all the people affected in one way or the other by the 9/11 attacks, in other words, to every resident of our planet Earth, remember the fallen.
This Flash was made by a New Yorker to remember the terrorist attacks exactly 3 years to this day.
I remember that day. My mom had asked me to turn off my radio to study. This was around 8:40pm, 8:40am New York time. If I had left it on for just 10 more minutes, I would have heard Jamie Yeo break the news that a plane had hit one of the World Trade Center towers in New York. While the 4 planes that were hijacked crashed along with a few hundred innocent lives and the terrorists that held them hostage, I just sat there studying, blissfully unaware. Around 10, I stooped because I wanted to watch WWF SummerSlam. My sister came in my room, with a weird look on her face. I didn't ask why, I was so focused on waiting for SummerSlam to start. I turned on my radio for awhile. The music was sombre, Jamie was speaking in a mournful tone. Then I realized something was wrong. But then SummerSlam started and I turned off the radio before I learned why.
The theme song to SummerSlam was playing. I remembered thinking, "Hey! Catchy!" And then finally, tracking at the bottom of my screen, I finally realised why my sister looked weird, why Jamie sounded so sad. "The second tower of the World Trade Center has collapsed." That's what it said. I immediately switched to Channel NewsAsia. I think you can guess what I saw. And keep in mind that the TV I was watching was in black & white, so that made everything darker, more vivid. In the end, I forgot about WWF, that seemed inconsequential compared to this. An attack on humanity.
I don't care about what happened after. The distrust of some people against Islam, the wars, the economy. All I cared about was the people that died. The brave people that dared to stand up to the terrorists in one of the planes and thereby saving possibly the White House itself, at the expense of their lives. The people who jumped out of the towers to end it all, why delay the inevitable? I admit, all this made me look at my faith more carefully. But after all this, I was shocked, I was afraid, I was angry, but I was NOT surprised. With so many people hating America so much, something like this had to happen eventually. All the more unfortunate that it did happen.
To all the people affected in one way or the other by the 9/11 attacks, in other words, to every resident of our planet Earth, remember the fallen.
Friday, September 10, 2004
Monday, September 06, 2004
An Open Message to any Non-Wrestling Fan Out There
This is a column from Da J-Train from LordsOfPain.net, a wrestling fan site. I am in complete agreement with everything said here.
"Hi, I’m Da J-Train, and I’ve been a wrestling fan since I’ve been really young. Deal With It! I have just been getting sick and tired of these non wrestling fans out there bitching and snickering about professional wrestling and how terrible it is. We all have our likes and dislikes, and it’s a little presumptuous of non wrestling fans to impose on something we like just because they don’t like it.
I am a person who believes that something that brings joy to you can’t bring you that much harm… well, short of Doritos. This is the way I have viewed wrestling in the course of my viewing time throughout my life. I like wrestling, and if you don’t big fucking deal. Do you want a cookie? I don’t know, I suppose I am sick of these condescending people who I seem to constantly come in contact with when I am watching wrestling and they snicker or make stupid comments about how dumb wrestling is for a variety of reasons. You see, I don’t get this at all. I mean, most wrestling fans have been watching for a long time, and a good deal of them have been watching since childhood like I have. Do you really think YOUR opinion is going to make a difference in that? If not, shut up.
All of the complaints are usually all the same, at least with the people I have encountered. They all say the same things, but in a different variety. After all, is there really all that much that you can complain about a subject that you know nothing about? These are the complaints I usually hear…
Ugh, This Stuff Is SO Fake OR You Know This Stuff Is Fake, Right?: No! Really? Wow! Since when? Yeah, we all know wrestling a fake, get over it. Unless you are a deaf and dumb pig, you know that wrestling is fake. Guess what? I like it ANYWAY. So they know the outcome before it happens, big deal. There’s more to a wrestling match than the outcome. We, as wrestling fans, when he decided to like wrestling despite knowing it’s fake, all unconsciously decided to suspend logic when it came to wrestling. Logically, realism says that many of these moves could incapacitate a person for a while, or at least give these wrestlers some sort of abrasion. However, they don’t, and we’ve decided to look past realism because it’s fun to pretend!
I Don’t Watch Wrestling Anymore… it was SOOO Much Better In *Insert Period of Time*: So wrestling was better before? So what? So many things were better in the past than now. Rock music was better back in the 60’s and 70’s and early 90’s, but I still listen. Film hasn’t had a truly great year since 1994, but I still go to the movies. Every entertainment medium has their low points, why should wrestling be any different? Sure, the WWF was better a long time ago and in the mid to late 90’s, I’m still gonna watch anyway. Why? Because that’s what a fan does. Fans don’t ditch something just because it’s a sinking ship, and then bash it years later. So shut up, seriously, because chances are that something you follow closely has been better in the past.
Oh who cares… they’re just on steroids anyway: Oh, I see, so you are gonna judge all of professional wrestling based on a single scandal? That’s great logic, asshole. By that logic, all professional basketball players have been accused of sexual assault right? A boxer was just accused of raping a woman in Nicaragua, but it doesn’t mean I’m gonna judge all of boxing for that scandal for the rest of time. Really, people have to get over the whole steroids in wrestling thing and start getting tougher on the whole steroids in baseball thing… at LEAST that’s contemporary. Almost every aspect of our culture has had scandal attached to it. If people really wanted to stop doing something because of that thing’s association with scandals, they would have to stop buying corporate made products, they would have to stop voting because of past White House scandals, there would be no more worship of Roman Catholicism, and most of the professional, collegiate, and Olympic sports would be null and void. So shut up about wrestling and steroids.
What’s the point of watching? It’s SO predictable, you know who’s gonna win: How? How do YOU know who’s going to win? There are a select few who knows who is gonna win, and chances are YOU aren’t one of them. The best part about this is that most of the time that these people say this, the person that they said was gonna win ends up losing! The last time this happened to me was the HHH vs. Shelton Benjamin match and the guy who said it felt like an ass afterwards. To be honest, most of the time, you know who is gonna win, but there are many times that the WWE creates an illusion of spontaneity and throws in a monkey bone.
I guess I take all this stuff too personally, but after I have watched wrestling as long as I have, and am in an atmosphere where no one else watches, it gets a little to me when you hear the same stuff over and over again. I can hardly stand it when wrestling fans are extremely negative about wrestling… but non wrestling fans have no excuse or basis for what they are saying. They usually give really general reasons for their criticism which could get turned around to apply to anything.
So this I say to any non wrestling fans who may be reading… although I fully understand that I am writing this on a wrestling website, therefore little to no non wrestling fans will be reading… but I am saying it anyway… Shut the fuck up. Stop judging wrestling and its fans based on nothing! Allow us to watch what we enjoy. Chances are, we’ll always return the favor… and if we don’t, beat us with a stick."
"Hi, I’m Da J-Train, and I’ve been a wrestling fan since I’ve been really young. Deal With It! I have just been getting sick and tired of these non wrestling fans out there bitching and snickering about professional wrestling and how terrible it is. We all have our likes and dislikes, and it’s a little presumptuous of non wrestling fans to impose on something we like just because they don’t like it.
I am a person who believes that something that brings joy to you can’t bring you that much harm… well, short of Doritos. This is the way I have viewed wrestling in the course of my viewing time throughout my life. I like wrestling, and if you don’t big fucking deal. Do you want a cookie? I don’t know, I suppose I am sick of these condescending people who I seem to constantly come in contact with when I am watching wrestling and they snicker or make stupid comments about how dumb wrestling is for a variety of reasons. You see, I don’t get this at all. I mean, most wrestling fans have been watching for a long time, and a good deal of them have been watching since childhood like I have. Do you really think YOUR opinion is going to make a difference in that? If not, shut up.
All of the complaints are usually all the same, at least with the people I have encountered. They all say the same things, but in a different variety. After all, is there really all that much that you can complain about a subject that you know nothing about? These are the complaints I usually hear…
Ugh, This Stuff Is SO Fake OR You Know This Stuff Is Fake, Right?: No! Really? Wow! Since when? Yeah, we all know wrestling a fake, get over it. Unless you are a deaf and dumb pig, you know that wrestling is fake. Guess what? I like it ANYWAY. So they know the outcome before it happens, big deal. There’s more to a wrestling match than the outcome. We, as wrestling fans, when he decided to like wrestling despite knowing it’s fake, all unconsciously decided to suspend logic when it came to wrestling. Logically, realism says that many of these moves could incapacitate a person for a while, or at least give these wrestlers some sort of abrasion. However, they don’t, and we’ve decided to look past realism because it’s fun to pretend!
I Don’t Watch Wrestling Anymore… it was SOOO Much Better In *Insert Period of Time*: So wrestling was better before? So what? So many things were better in the past than now. Rock music was better back in the 60’s and 70’s and early 90’s, but I still listen. Film hasn’t had a truly great year since 1994, but I still go to the movies. Every entertainment medium has their low points, why should wrestling be any different? Sure, the WWF was better a long time ago and in the mid to late 90’s, I’m still gonna watch anyway. Why? Because that’s what a fan does. Fans don’t ditch something just because it’s a sinking ship, and then bash it years later. So shut up, seriously, because chances are that something you follow closely has been better in the past.
Oh who cares… they’re just on steroids anyway: Oh, I see, so you are gonna judge all of professional wrestling based on a single scandal? That’s great logic, asshole. By that logic, all professional basketball players have been accused of sexual assault right? A boxer was just accused of raping a woman in Nicaragua, but it doesn’t mean I’m gonna judge all of boxing for that scandal for the rest of time. Really, people have to get over the whole steroids in wrestling thing and start getting tougher on the whole steroids in baseball thing… at LEAST that’s contemporary. Almost every aspect of our culture has had scandal attached to it. If people really wanted to stop doing something because of that thing’s association with scandals, they would have to stop buying corporate made products, they would have to stop voting because of past White House scandals, there would be no more worship of Roman Catholicism, and most of the professional, collegiate, and Olympic sports would be null and void. So shut up about wrestling and steroids.
What’s the point of watching? It’s SO predictable, you know who’s gonna win: How? How do YOU know who’s going to win? There are a select few who knows who is gonna win, and chances are YOU aren’t one of them. The best part about this is that most of the time that these people say this, the person that they said was gonna win ends up losing! The last time this happened to me was the HHH vs. Shelton Benjamin match and the guy who said it felt like an ass afterwards. To be honest, most of the time, you know who is gonna win, but there are many times that the WWE creates an illusion of spontaneity and throws in a monkey bone.
I guess I take all this stuff too personally, but after I have watched wrestling as long as I have, and am in an atmosphere where no one else watches, it gets a little to me when you hear the same stuff over and over again. I can hardly stand it when wrestling fans are extremely negative about wrestling… but non wrestling fans have no excuse or basis for what they are saying. They usually give really general reasons for their criticism which could get turned around to apply to anything.
So this I say to any non wrestling fans who may be reading… although I fully understand that I am writing this on a wrestling website, therefore little to no non wrestling fans will be reading… but I am saying it anyway… Shut the fuck up. Stop judging wrestling and its fans based on nothing! Allow us to watch what we enjoy. Chances are, we’ll always return the favor… and if we don’t, beat us with a stick."
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